Foods That Don’t Matter

Generally there is an introduction where I try hard to develop some sort of narrative to lure you into clicking “read more”. The introductions are smart and occasionally witty. They are laced with my slick AF humour and inflated with false promises and guarantees. Writing introductions is almost like being a politician. You write until people vote for your post and read it. This translates into views that ultimately mean nothing, but your secretly insecure mind feels validated… temporarily…. Afterwards you realise that these views mean nothing and all joy fades to tears dust… I don’t have anything witty to tell you just now. Just click “read more” and we can start talking about how wrong the world is. TRIGGER WARNING.

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The Bar Problem

It’s been a little break. Now. Before you grab your shotguns (if you’re in the US) and pitchforks (if you’re in a sane country) I should point out that, Facebook-wise, I received far more likes over the period of me not writing… The only logical conclusion is that I’m funnier when I’m not trying, which sounds pretty sense-full…

It wouldn’t be a blog post if you weren’t going to gain something from reading it.Here is a guide on what snack you should buy. Specifically which chocolate bar.

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The Church Of LAD

The year is now 2017… Exciting for some. Many of us will turn a year older this year. Not all, of course, there are things that will get a little younger this year… Namely, the United States of America could potentially get younger by about 100 years over the next few months. Time will tell. And just like that, your well-planned introduction can get hijacked and fucked by politics… Let’s just assume that the last 72 words introduced the topic correctly. What’s the topic?

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Somebody Is Fucking My Toothbrush

This is something that has been a problem for me for a very long time. I would greatly appreciate your support as I share this, very serious and life damaging issue. Thank You for your acceptance…

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The Dawn Of Pockets

Here at Apparently I’m Funny we like to save words… When I say “we”, this really means just me. There is nobody else here… When I say “save words”, I mean increasing word efficiency.The previous post of this nature was all about saving time by expressing dates. The last post was very good, but now it’s time to up the ante… Today’s shit… is some good shit…

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