Did You Attack Me With A Laser?

It has to be said that my previous posts were a lot goofier. I would chat pure shit and usually not make any sense at all. What’s changed? Well, there is only one explanation. Somebody, one of you snakes, has given me sense. It was most likely a malicious act in which you tried to dull my imagination with logic. I now want you to take it back…

This attack of logic has left me shocked and horrified. Things that make sense are dangerous because they limit the things that I can write about. If I could only write about sense-making things, this blog would be full of pictures of funny cats. We can’t let that happen.

What made this attack so shocking is the fact that it happened over time. It was not a gunshot of logic. That would too quick. This was more along the lines of being strapped to one of those metal things and having the evil person turn on a laser that will slowly go across the metal thing, cutting everything in its way. This laser of logic has been turned on for days now and it’s getting close to my belly button.

Except it doesn’t really cut things does it? It just injects you with more and more sense and logic. Restructures your views of reality, makes you think about the future and worst of all.. it smells like Cranberry juice.

Thankfully I have managed to move all the sense and logic into a single hair. This is a very sense-making piece of hair. I’ve now ripped it out and will be mailing it back to the person who put all this sense in me. Get rekt m8.

You can’t win… Muahahah.

Images:

flickr photo by astroshots42 https://flickr.com/photos/astro-pics/8468331718 shared under a Creative Commons (BY) license

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2 thoughts on “Did You Attack Me With A Laser?

  1. Perhaps “the snake” that did this was your own brain, feeding off the own words it was crafting day after day writing blog posts and evolving into making sense. Whatever it is, please find a way to evolve before you hit the cat picture stage…that would be a shame for everyone involved.

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    • You must be right! It was my brain. I’ve already started the removal process so that it will be gone in no time! Hopefully I can complete the treatment before before the impending “cat gifs” stage ruins it all 😀

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